Wednesday, December 12, 2007
I'm so burnt out on this graduate application shit. i just wanna go back to playing my ps2. It's almost over. I've sent out around 10 applications. It's taken nearly a year to get this far and i only have 2 applications left to go. fuck I am tired of this. It better be worth it going to grad school. I swear to god if going to film school turns out to be a waste of time that could have been bypassed by bribing someone I'm going to lose it.
Saturday, December 08, 2007
My film as it was submitted to CalArts is done. Unfortunately, I cannot load it here or youtube since the limit is 100mb and my film is a little bigger. I'll figure something out. My applications are about 90% done and I have a couple more to go. So, again I will probably be on hiatus until the new year with the occasional post here and ther but don't expect to much from me as I am exhausted and have started playing BULLY on the PS2 which is kinda like doing heroin without the nodding off.
Friday, November 02, 2007
Happy Belated Halloween! We had a good one. We celebrated Chino and Irina's B-day with all the kids we could find and nearly had to shut things down when the Dance Dance Revolution got to crazy. I went as a zombie, Irina as a witch and chino a pilot. His costume was cool but he refused to wear the GWB mask i was going to get him or the sign i was going to hang on him that reads "Mission not Accomplished." I shouldn't use my son to make political statements but, so what? Check back in a couple of weeks because i won't be writing anything until after Nov. 15th or so. That is the deadline for my applications to a couple of graduate programs. keep your fingers crossed for me. This time next year i will either be a Comparative Literature student at UC Riverside, a Screen writer at USC or a film student at Cal Arts!!!
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
That was a week ago. The creepy thing is that I live far from where the wildfires are still burning. Though, i was @ Disney last week and it was pretty dark and you couldn't see very far South. It looks like things are getting better but, I hope they catch the low life who set the fires and stick a hot poker up his ass.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
everyone from these parts seems to embrace. Whatever! But, the zeppelin hit the control tower tonight as Jenna Jameson went in for a tat at the West Hollyweird shop on tonight's episode. First off, they introduced her as Jenna Jameson, entrepreneur. What a load of bullshit! She's a fucking porno whore. That's it! don't care if she made a million selling vibrating, silicone molds of her twat (she really did), she is a porn whore first and foremost. Look, I'm self-righteous and a total prick about alot of things but, I'm right on this. The bitch did what she had to do to get to where she is; I won't pass judgement, but I'll be damned if I just sit back and pretend she didn't make her money doing gangbangs and girl on girl shots. She got inked up with a quote from Joan of Arc, "I am not afraid, I was born for this." The whole time she was sitting there talking shit about how she conquered the corporate world by being a tough as nails, hardcore, business, cunt that fired people without mercy and took no prisoners in the boardroom. Bitch please! You know damn well you can't claw your way to the top laying on your back! Seriously though, I don't care if she made millions getting her every orifice stuffed, at least have the dignity to say, "I'm a ho and I made it by being a ho." Don't pretend that the years you spent with your feet in the air and the cameras rolling never existed; she must have lost her mind, at least the part that deals with memory . If Joan of Arc, which she claims to have studied extensively, were alive today I believe she would have willingly, thrown herself into a bonfire knowing that a woman was making $, not to survive but to be able to wear Jimmy Choo. And by the way, the picture is of Jenna when she was good looking. She now looks like that spice girl that married Becks, but with half her face chopped off "my main man" (bonus points if you know the reference). I still love Kat von D but, sweety, next time you have a phony in the hot seat make em' bleed real good or at least give them a tat of a penis with their name in the place of the shaft.
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
This is what happens when "Childrens" don't learn. I know the argument about cruel and unusual punishment and I believe in the constitution but, I don't understand what would be so wrong about maybe just taking a couple of fingers off of one of their hands. Fuck, even if it was their non-dominant one I'd be happy. You know, cut off the balls of a rapist, the fingers off a thief. If it were up to me we'd lobotomize half the hardened (violent) criminals in prison. Maybe it's a good thing it's not up to me.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Friday, September 21, 2007
In other news:
How the fuck did this idiot get taken seriously? We have lost our fucking minds in this country! I understand that everyone has something to say. I'm proof of it. But, for christ's sake all this douche bag did was tape himself crying over Brittany Spears and now CNN is profiling him. If that's all it takes I should be making Brad Pitt $ and adopting kids with Angelina. I'm not jealous; I just don't get how someone without talent, without any special ability or even good looks can get famous these days. We are truly desperate for entertainment and attention in this country. Oh yeah, CNN can go fuck themselves! In fact all American media outlets in this country can eat shit! Our country is asleep at the wheel and all these assholes can do is put the Brittany guy and OJ on the front page. What a bunch of bullshit!
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
I know So. Carolina is not known for churning out Einsteins, but for christ's sake! She's gotta be dumber than Brittany Spears. Speaking of which, I think it's great that shes trying to have K-fed whacked. The hillbillyness of it all is too much for me. I'm serious when I say what this country needs is another Sherman's March to Sea.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Monday, September 03, 2007
am happy to report that despite what conspiracy buffs might report on the net, the Turkeys are safe and chillin at Disneyland. Now, it is possible that these are not the actual turkeys but i am not the one to investigate the claims that we are being fooled by our government into believing that the Thanksgiving turkey is actually pardoned every year. In any case, I am happy for the turkeys living in this corral. They appear content, well fed and ignored by most everyone who walks past them. Maybe we can put the people that Dick Cheney wants to shoot in the face in a corral here also. By the way, if you have been enjoying this blog for awhile now, you might want to consider a small donation. The paypal link at the bottom works really nice and god knows I don't want to have to go out and get a real job. This turkey don't get fed for free.
Saturday, August 25, 2007
It's not just any dog and cat. A Siamese, known to have the worst tempers known in the cat world and a Chihuahua, known for their nervous breakdowns and annoying yaps. No, I didn't have them sewn together this way. No, they are not sedated. They genuinely love each other. They play all night long and sleep together during the day. Sometimes the cat gives out a hiss or the dog an aggressive bark. Sometimes the cat eats the dog's food and sometimes the dog eats the cat's food. But, these two get along really nicely for arch enemies. Now, how do we conquer darkness and hate? Using Love or bullets? Following the way of the gun or the way of the housepet? If they can do it, why can't we all?
Sunday, August 12, 2007
been reborn from the ashes of nature's destructive
forces, a new civilization will come. They will find this planet was the home to an entire culture of cruel species that was bored beyond belief. However, they will come to understand that we knew how to party, because among the rubble and waste of our dead planet they will encounter a great temple where the people of this fallen world came to pray, give many alms and pay tribute to their omnipotent deity. Among those ruins they will discover a god mightier than any they have ever encountered. A god that, with the help of his big, orange dog and a lower god that took the form of a talking duck , used his powers to give the inhabitants of this wasted world the thing that they truly wanted. They did not seek enlightenment or a utopia. They wanted entertainment and that was the gift that this almighty and powerful rodent god gave to them. May the Mouse bless you and keep you safe.
Sunday, August 05, 2007
Sunday, July 29, 2007
Top 5 random thoughts as a walked the floor:
1. " I swear to god I'm going to murder the cocksucker who invented pokemon."
2. " Jesus, that's Margot Kidder rummaging through that box of discounted toys. How the mighty have fallen."
3. "If my son ever comes home with a pair of little plastic wings sewn into a tunic I will take my own life."
4. "I never realized the importance of healthy semen until now."
5. "I bet a thermite reaction in this place would put a huge dent in ratings for "Lost" this coming season."
Alright, it wasn't all so bad. Aside from having a handicapped guy give me a dirty look (fuck him, I was shitting myself and his little scooter was too slow) and having a moron shake a felt tip marker till the ink went flying all over my arm, it was a good experience. I got tons of SWAG and i bought a cool book on writing horror stories and got a kit for painting dragons. So, I guess that geeks are OK in my book. I just consider myself really lucky i discovered pussy and beer in high school.
Saturday, July 14, 2007
I am having production delays on my film. I still have a couple of scenes to shoot and one of my actors has flown the coup. Not to mention the problems with the editing software. But, I will persevere and this film will get made. I'm just not sure how yet????
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
You are looking at 1 of only 2 production stills from my new movie project titled: Wood, Steel, Plastic. Once it is done and has been submitted to USC or CalArts or both for consideration of admission to film school, I will be posting it probably on You Tube. The shooting of the film is nearly completed and I have a few more scenes to shoot before editing can begin. That's my homie Henry and he was a real sport. We woke up real early a couple times and with the help of my buddy Shanks, we were out at the crack of dawn making movie magic on Hermosa Beach and slugging down Irish car bombs with Sean Young afterwards. What a treat! I'm in a better mood now that Paris Hilton is back behind bars. I certainly feel safer and would only feel evan safer if she were sharing a cell with Osama bin Butthole in a dark, secret CIA prison in Turkey. I have been caught up playing the XBOX 360, which Henry brought into town and now i must reignite the synapse in order to get back to reading and studying film. That should explain the stagnant state of my reading and viewing lists. But, truth be told that Dead Rising is the shit! Especially if you are as big a fan of horror movies as I am, especially the zombie ones. I played a bunch of other games on the system including a few first person shooters but, Dead Rising is awesome! Also, I was impressed by the system's speed and graphics. Nice stuff but, till the price drops below $200, including a hard drive and a game, Bill Gates can kiss my Cuban ass.
Thursday, June 07, 2007
Sunday, June 03, 2007
Writing is taking up alot of my time and working on my films has been a nightmare, especially since the software I'm using is harder than Ron Jeremy in a room full of blonds and less user friendly. I have been working late into the dawn and produced very little, but that is better than most writers are capable of. Most days I resemble the fella in the picture, but for me, forward is the only direction in which the shark can move. I'll take an 8 hour stretch at the keyboard with nothing to show for it, over 8 seconds @ a cubicle, with a fat paycheck, a cup of starbucks and an employee of the century parking space any fucking day of the week. god bless those who do it, but this kid's moved on to greener pastures; so you can keep yer pursuit of the perfect SUV, yer flow charts and action item reports. My parachute ain't golden, in fact the fucking thing has holes in it; but, i'd rather hit the ground and feel the rush, then glide through it all and say it was a snooze fest.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Speaking of naziesque behavior; when is the Iraq war going to end? The Dems have done what we should always expect them to do, which is bend over and take it up the balloon knot. Why can't I vote for that fucking party you ask? Because it is the home of douche bag, cry babys that are never satisfied with anything and fat-faced liars who would do and say anything to remain in power. If you tell the American people you are going to do something, don't make excuses; do what you said you were going to Washington to do. The Republicans, much to my chagrin, tell people they are going to force gay people to go into hiding, make school children weep for the crucificion or create death squads to kill hippies by the road side and by golly they at least try to get it done! Personally, I can't wait for the next election. I'm certain that people are going to either avoid the polls, be disenfranchised by Republicans like last time or get stuck with the Hillary option (who incidentally isn't fit to be dog catcher). That's cool, cuz I figure we can get back to some good ol fashioned book burnings soon as this peace craze blows over. Oh, guess what? It looks like it has now that Cindy Sheehan is fed up with the Dems too. Who can blame her? We live in a nation where people care less about what is going on in another country, that we have invaded, than keeping count of Lindsay Lohan's drug rehab schedule (what is this, the second or third time?).
The children are doomed.
Monday, May 21, 2007
The republican party is now the home for gay hating, jesus freaks and the fifty percent of Americans who don't believe in evolution but, believe that Nascar is a fucking sport. You've got Huckabee who thinks creationism should be taught in schools, Romney who wants to double the size of Guantanamo, though most credible human rights organizations agree it should be shut down, Rudy who's only claim to being a good leader is being the mayor of NY on 9/11 and Tancredo who despises Mexicans and thinks that Jack Bauer will save us if terrorists strike. Those of you wondering why I don't love McCain I can only say that, yes, I liked the guy but lost respect for him in the last couple elections when he let Rove and Bush off the hook after they called his wife a drug addict and said his children were mud baby's from an extramarital affair; any man who would put politics before family doesn't deserve my vote. Basically, it looks like the GOP is sitting out this next election; guess we will have to wait until Jeb Bush decides to run to be afraid of being Americans again. I will miss the days of having to put off vacations outside the U.S., but it's a small price to pay if we can get our collective sanity back.
It's really to early for all of this. Why are all of these people getting lined up 18 months before the shit goes down? I don't get it. Why is everyone in such a hurry to replace the worst president in history? I mean they are having debates and everything. Could it be because now that the office of the presidency and politics in general has been so tarnished, so irrevocably made to be despised, the only way is up and the next president will be able to do everything short of murdering an infant on live television and still look like Kennedy? After what we have just been through for the last 8 years I don't blame people for feeling weird about politics, but we get the kind of government that we deserve and if we don't demand that these party's give us better alternatives, we will get more of the same; better yet we should demand more than just these 2 lame ass political parties. Whats wrong with have a Socialist or a green or libertarian or even fascist party candidate. It's diversity that strengthens the democratic system and makes us appreciate our system of government. Jesus, are we that shell shocked and traumatized by the Bush years that will settle for anything at this point?
Monday, May 14, 2007
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Wednesday, April 18, 2007
What a terrible thing that happened at Va Tech! Fucking Pyscho, I hope he rots! And if we really give a shit about waht happened and don't want to see it happen again, then we have to shut down these right wing nuts that believe that the constitution provides for the common joe owning a Barrett .50 cal. It's retarded to allow violent, sick, people access to high powered rifles and hollow points. And by sick, violent people I mean ALL AMERICANS! Don't think we are sick and Violent? Go back and watch "Bowling for Columbine" or don't take Michael Moore's word for it read, "Overthrow" by Kinzer; he's got plenty of material to demonstrate the violent historical nature of our country. And by the way, how is it that the same nuts who are ok with little kids murdering each other with AKs have such a problem with a woman deciding when the kid she can't take care of or love would be better off dead? Whats the fucking difference whether it's in the womb or the street or in the 3rd tri-mester or sixth grade? The fucking hypocrites should be hung by their cocks.
In lighter news, I ran into Ernest Borgnine at LAX the other day. He asked me what flight the luggage coming down the conveyor belt in front of us was from and as you know, I am very easily star struck so, I just froze up and pretended I was deaf and retarded. He was a great guy. Shook hands, even signed an autograph, with a huge smile I might add, for a youngster. You know he is cool, after all he saved Snake in that alley. I wonder how he got through airport security with those molotov cocktails in his luggage? He is not to be harmed in the race war!
Newt Gingrich is such a douche bag. Not only does this not mke any fucking sense but, he just goes on and on and ultimately he's so off the mark. The only ones that want to silence people are his buddys on the religious right. Fuck him:
Thursday, April 12, 2007
Monday, April 09, 2007
Monday, March 12, 2007
It's annoying, man! I don't get it??? How is this OS supposed to make me go WOW!, like the commercial says? All it did was make the icons on my desktop bigger and maybe increased the speed of the computer, other than that it took 2 hours to load, 3 system re-formats, because of "conflicts", no less than a dozen reboots and the re-installation of at least six different programs; oh and by the way Mcafee doesn't work on it and Firefox can't run "fuck all" on it. Fucking Gates! His way or the super information highway.
Anyway, computers suck! Too bad there aren't more arcades like the one you see here. We discovered this place and had a blast. They had a shit load of games, forget Enchanted Castle, this place has outdoor mini golf, laser tag, a pizzeria and even a water slide (I luv California). The entire back area is full of old school games like: Galaga, Centipede, Pacman, a ton of Pinball machines and even a couple of those old school racing games like Pole Position. Rock on Camelot, for though art the mightiest most bad ass castle in all South Cali!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Monday, February 26, 2007
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
The business card for "StarKidz" in Bev Hills is full colored and beautifully laminated and shows the inside of what is supposedly the inside of their actual studio; but like most things Hollywood, it is all an illusion. A little bit of research led us to the truth. These chicken hawks are feeding off the hopes of the poor, thats why the franken-scumbag was out combing the Walmarts. It turns out that StarKidz is under investigation by the State of California and has been ripping people off for years; in fact, they haven't been able to nail down the owner of the place. She is apparently a very elusive and shadowy figure. The scam is always the same, they approach, they invite, no money exchange initially takes place, then they test your kid and his scores are off the charts. Low and behold they need 2k to keep the wheels greased and of course nothing ever comes of your kids acting career. Now the upsetting thing is that they target the poor and gullible and use their own sense of hopelessness against them. In Hollywoodland one must always be vigilant. Let this be a lesson to you. Only you should take advantage of your kidz, don't let a total stranger do it, no matter what they promise you.
Friday, February 09, 2007
First wave: Nintendo. These guys know customer service. The DS breaks down and I get a replacement, hassle free within a week. They sent it out in a UPS box, I send it back, everyone is happy. Too bad they are a Japanese company, cuz they would make great Americans. Hats off to Nintendo, they are the kind of company the founding fathers intended when they wrote up the Bill of Consumer Rights. God Bless em'.
Round 2: Americinn Hotels. Long story short the manager of the Wickenburg, AZ chain refuses to refund $100 to my mother in law's credit card. Hey, I called in the cancellation, its not my fault your people are retarded. I call customer relations they tell me to talk to him again. I talk to him again, blah, blah. Fuck it, write the CEO a nasty "how dare you people steal money from a little ol' lady living on a pension..." letter. Like Trump says, you want to get something done, you talk to the boss. You will give me my money back Luke Fowler, Mr. hot shot CEO. If you don't I'm finna tear yo punk ass up.
The third front and the bitch of the bunch: Creative Labs. If you ever have a choice between rinsing your genitals with battery acid and buying a Creative Labs MP3 player, i suggest the scrotum scour any day. They are the worst company in the world. Pathetic tech support, the software is pure rubbish and they don't stand behind anything they sell. Shame on you Creative. They made me give them $25 and send the device in to fix it, saying it was out of warranty. Sounds reasonable right? If it's out of warranty why should they absorb the cost of fixing it? This isn't conducive to meeting the bottom line; who could blame them???
I do! Shame on you Creative, your tech support monkeys gave me bad advice and it broke my device. I called them cuz their shitty software wasn't working on my new laptop and they wound up telling me to remove the firmware on the player, which totally screwed up the goddamn thing and to add insult to injury they make me pay for the repair. They refuse to acknowledge that they did anything wrong. Fucking scumbag, loser, greedy, corporate douchey boys! You're going to pay for this Creative! My minions will hunt your fat, little, piggy, corporate officers down like the Manson family and eat your guts in your summer homes on the cape. Or maybe they just won't buy any of your lousy Creative Labs, counterfeit, ghetto, Chinese, second rate, garbage, caca, products.
Final battle: Samsung. Not very good phones. Bad reception, bad battery life. the good thing is they have a one year warranty and they will replace the battery (if it tests, less than 80% (whatever!)). Bad news, no phone for about 10 days (or maybe thats good news (whatever)) and they made me send it out to them instead of sending out a replacement battery.
Remember, fight the good fight and don't let the bastards get you down. STAY ANGRY!
Sunday, January 28, 2007
Fear is useless; whether it is fear of a trap door opening under you in the middle of Hollywood Boulevard or fear of corporate fascists who would silence you. I begin with a big shout out to Randi Rhodes who, when I can, listen to on Air America Radio. She won a case against a murderous group of butchers known as CACI International. They were the folks who brought you Abu Ghraib, though you wouldn't know it if you only watched American media outlets. Our media found a bunch of hillbilly dropouts to blame the whole thing on and these pigs at CACI, Blackwater, Titan, et. al. walked. Randi spoke truth and, though I'm certain it cost her and her employers some green, she fought it out and won.
It's the kinda story that gives me faith in the system. Though not much, because if the system had it's shit together the only ones on trial would be the gut eaters who are stealing our tax dollars in the name of liberty. Speaking of stealing tax dollars, ever wonder what happens to military surplus items? The Iranians and the Chinese use it to prepare for war against us: http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/01/16/military.surplus.ap/
Of course, most money we spend as taxpayers goes towards positive things right? Building and re-building the infrastructure of countries we helped destroy is the American way. We have big hearts and big wallets to go with our big bombs. Unfortunately, we have become complacent in our everyday lives and the result is people doing things in our name that we wouldn't approve of: http://corpwatch.org/downloads/AfghanistanINCfinalsmall.pdf
But, none of this should come as a surprise. You are as tired as I am or your neighbor is or anyone you know is with politics. At the very least you are distracted and please don't deny it or make excuses for it, I understand. Lincoln Steffens was right, however; "we deserve the government that we have." This is as true now as it was a hundred years ago when he first wrote it. So, sit back, relax and don't worry, cuz when we all float down Hollywood Blvd. with our third degree suntans and some Jesus freak is waving a rifle at your kids on the roof of the Griffith Observatory those cocksuckers who pull the strings will fly away to their mountain top bomb shelters and ride out the apocalypse and that big ol' trap door won't be so threatening
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Sunday, January 14, 2007
NEXT WEEK: SUNSET BOULEVARD, THE SWEARING GUY AND THE SWEET SMELL OF HOPELESSNESS.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
AWWWWWWWW, Hell NAW!! You know you want to try my Paella! It was delicious and the pan is from Spain courtesy of my favorite conquistador, The Madrid Mangler, JuanJo. Ya can't make it in a regular frying pan, don't you dare try to make it in a wok (I will slap you) and if you try to make it in a pot you are a philistine! And Please please PLEASE, don't put a bunch of crazy shit in it. Pork, chicken, shrimp thats it! You can use lobster tails if you want to splurge and you "gots it like that". Otherwise, Sit down and enjoy the delicious taste of Spain with a bottle of "Sangre Del Torro" and the great company of your family and friends; thats what I did this New Years. i hope your's went just as well. Happy New Years! Lets hope everything gets better now that the Democrats are in charge and Saddam is gone.