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Friday, August 29, 2008

A M.I.L.F. in Every Home!

Put aside the fact that no one knows who the fuck Sarah Palin is outside of Alaska. Put aside the fact that she is the first Republican female vice president nominee, ever. Put aside the fact that she hates polar bears and wants to put an oil well on every square foot of Alaskan soil. Forget that she has been charged with ethical hijinx in her state since the beginning of her political career. The reality is that she is a hot piece of ass! Now I know that's not a very in-depth analysis or even very mature, but she is the first politician to ever give me wood. So, though I may be taking a big ol' shit on her over the next few weeks, I just want to go on record as giving credit to McCain, (just this once) for making a smart move. Let's face it, he threw us for a loop and has actually drawn attention to his campaign by picking Stiffler's mom as a running mate. Of course, once you actually look into her as a VP choice it turns out she's a fucking train wreck. I thought he was going to pick some old shriveled up piece of confederate cabbage for a running mate and instead he makes the brilliant decision to pick someone that would make any NASCAR fan drop trou in a moment. It's interesting, especially because it appears to confirm that in today's political climate you have to have a minority on the ticket. We should have a Chicano President any time now (ODELAY, RAZA!!!). I hear that Sarah Palin actually plays the flute. I wonder if she ever attended band camp?
By the way, did you see the "American Promise" speech BO gave on Thursday evening? If you didn't you really should. I'm a hard boiled political junkie and I am usually the first one to yell "Bullshit" when I hear it. But, this was just an amazing speech. It was reminiscent of Ronnie Reagan in the sense that, BO just laid it all out and made you feel good to be an American. He shot a few rounds over the bow of the "Straight Talk Express" and put those assholes on notice that he wasn't going to take any "Swift boat" bullshit from them. He showed that he is ready. Man, I can't wait until this guy is president!

Sunday, August 24, 2008

This Probably Won't Help But...

Would the Hillary supporters please shut this window and go read the Huffington Post or the NYT online. We'll wait, it's no problem... I'll be here next week with something funny or interesting to say that won't offend you... Ok, are they gone? Good. What a bunch of swollen pussies those people are. Can you believe them?? Jesus, She fucking lost get over it! What the fuck is wrong with those people?? It's like the fate of the fucking country is resting upon the ability of stupid children to learn how to share. Clearly these assholes don't have any sense of decency or loyalty. And I'm not talking about the Democratic party. I'm talking about human decency and loyalty to our country. Fuck the Democratic party. These days they're just as bad as the GOP and have clearly not learned a fucking thing from their nearly 14 year exile. Joe Biden is not exactly what I was hoping for. The guy has a great record but let's face it, he's not the CHANGE we are being told we can BELIEVE in. The problem with these Hillaristas is that they haven't got a sense of fair play. Kind of like Hillary. This coming election is about issues. McCain wants to keep us in Iraq for the next 100 years, Barack doesn't; McCain doesn't know how many houses he owns, Barack does; a McCain presidency promises to be an extended play of the same shitty, fascist agendas of the last 30 years, Barack clearly wants to shake things up a bit. So, why is it so hard for the Hillaristas to give it up, close ranks and move forward? I think examining who these fucking people are might be constructive. Let's see, for the most part they have been described as suburban, females with families of two or more that have white collar jobs or a husband who carries all the weight. In other words, they are the bored, clap traps that you see when you take a day off from work and go into a Target or Starbucks to hang out for awhile. You know, they have the work out clothes on, even though they don't go to the gym or they have the hottest new phones with earpiece, even though they're hands are always free because they DON'T DO FUCKING SHIT ALL DAY! Seriously, gals, you need to get a fucking life. Go work with blind kids or better yet volunteer to work a few hours a week on a political campaign. I hear there's this really great candidate named Barack that wants to make our country a better place, he could sure use the help. Vote for McCain? What the fuck is wrong with them? There's much more at stake right now then Hillary and Bill's tired ass agenda. If the constitution means anything to you, if sending young men and women to their deaths matters to you, if you think the common person who is struggling to keep their home is worth standing up for then, for fucks sake, how can you say you are a Democrat who intends to vote for McCain because it ain't Hillary? Jesus, get your fucking head examined!!!

UPDATE: This is a great link showing a couple of these nutcases in action. It's great to see a diseased mind fall apart on CNN:

Thursday, August 14, 2008

... Seen Eating Shit While he Fucked a Dead Goat.

This asshole is Jerome Corsi. For those of you who don't know him he has a Ph.D from Harvard and is a right wing bigot who has written a number of trashy books used to spread lies about people, nations and institutions that he doesn't like. He uses innuendo to make his point and though i refuse to read the non-sense that his asshole publisher apparently doesn't have time to fact check, i understand that he uses alot of what right wing bloggers and fascist websites print as footnotes. This is the same guy who took a big shit on John Kerry a few years back. Since then, that book has been discredited and exposed for a pack of lies. Though sugar balls over here has already been called out and his lies have all been revealed, he has refused to go away. Now, he has a book on the NY Times best seller list, which attacks BO with lie after lie. He accuses BO of being a Muslim, and of having been a drug abuser while serving in the senate, just to name a couple of lies this douchebag is trying to spread. You know all those fucked up emails you get accusing Obama of being everything short of a child molester? Basically, this fucking jag off uses those for research in this book. He does stuff like accuse BO of having connections to violent, radical, left wing organizations like the Weather Underground. When challenged, as he was by Paul Waldman of Media Matters on Larry King, he quickly backs down by saying things like, "I'm just asking the question"; what an asshole! How this idiot got published is no mystery. Simon and Schuster is no different than most publishing houses, in that they see $ as a priority over literary integrity. The saddest thing about this is that there are enough idiots out there that want to believe this garbage that they will buy this asshole's book, regardless of what a bunch of bullshit it is or the fact that the author is a joke in the literary and academic world. So, next time you see, "Obama Nation" on the book stand just keep walking because I heard that the author was high on PCP when he wrote it and that he was actually seen by some mongolian tourists jamming a 14 inch red dildo up his ass and blowing an asian lady boy on his dead mother's grave while, cutting off the heads of Mexican babies and eating their brains. Or it could have been another guy; I'm just asking the question could it have been him????

Monday, August 11, 2008

Wait... Aren't They All a Bunch of Commies???

This is the danger in fighting illegal wars. Here's a news flash: The U.S. has always struck preemptively. It's the way we have always done things. The gun boat diplomacy that destroyed harbors and port cities from Korea to Hawaii and everything in between since after the civil war, was just that; unjustifiable aggression in the name of open markets, territorial acquisition or just plain ol' shits and giggles. What sets these past acts of of arrogance apart is that we did them on the down low. We made ourselves out to be the victims or we made the argument that we were trying to bring the savages up to speed with the rest of the Western world or we just denied involvement and used money and covert action to stack the deck in our favor. This brings us to our current situation. We were warned that we would forever lose the moral high ground that the US has always been able to maintain, despite our past, if we invaded Iraq. Now it seems that the Russians are out to kick some ass in their own backyard. This isn't Chechnya where there was a credible threat and an argument could be made that the region's resources were of great importance to the Russians. This is Georgia; who aside from having a long history of pissing off Moscow, isn't really much of a threat. They are out-numbered, out-gunned and despite appearing to be holding their own (thanks, i should add, to their US military training) in the face of a brutally violent invasion, are bound to have their asses handed to them in this conflict. The Russians are using the old Rhineland defense for the invasion; "those are our people. We will protect them at all costs." And the rhetoric sounds the same as that of Washington prior to our invasion of Iraq (regime change, accusations of ethnic cleansing and ignoring the world's criticism). There was a time when we would have threatened to invade Russia, moved some troops around in Turkey, sent in a couple of carrier groups and the Russians would have shit and run. Now, things are different. We have a president that is a joke and a military that is bogged down in two unpopular and illegal (YES, ILLEGAL) wars. The Russians are now fighting their own war against terrorism and have called our bluff. Our initiative is lost. We cannot aid an ally. Our stock has dropped once again. Anyone still feel like voting for John McCain? Anyone still feel like voting?

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

For the Record... FUCK CHINA!

Here's a fucked up little tidbi;, George Bush refused to set foot in Greece at the last Olympics. GREECE, you know, birthplace of democracy and the home of saganaki (yum). Yet, he's proudly announced that there is no way he would ever miss out on the opening ceremonies of the Beijing Olympics. China, excuse me COMMUNIST China, is the worst, modern police state in the world. They have forced labor of children, imprisonment of social, political and religious activists, many of whom are sentenced to death and they have illegally occupied a sovereign nation for several decades, not to mention that they spy on their people in a way that would make that whole telecom thing look like a booger in my moo-shu. I know the Dalli Lama is full of shit. If he were restored to power he'd create his own little theocratic dictatorship, so fuck him too. But, for Christ's sake, China excuse me COMMUNIST China, has one of the worst human rights records on the planet and has for decades. Forget all that bullshit Lou Dobbs talks about these commie bastards trying to take over the world and destroying the middle class of our country. Our country's middle class has worse enemys trying to destroy it, including that biggoted asshole. Forget that the Chinese are so backwards that they honestly believe that the cure for everything from acne to Aids is powdered animal penis (I'd hate to be anything with fur and testicles in that country). China, excuse me COMMUNIST China, is one of the worst places on the planet to live if you have an opinion. I would be in prison right now if I had been born Chinese. That's because only the scared and the stupid can get by in a place like that. So, for every one of those people in their country that can't say it, I'll say it for you, FUCK CHINA!!!
I know we don't play fair when it comes to our trading practices; America plays the victim all the time when it comes to making money. We fuck people all over the world and pretend zero accountability is our birth right. It's been that way since we traded 12 beads for all of Manhattan Island. I know it and if you have been reading me long enough, so do you. But, China, excuse me COMMUNIST China, with the help of it's enablers like the Bush administration and money hungry corporations like Walmart, have been fucking not only Americans, but their own people as well. Last I checked the Chinese were among the worst paid, worst protected, most injured and killed on the job site and least skilled or educated workers world wide, thanks to their own government. So, for those of us who haven't got the balls to say it, I'll say it, FUCK GREEDY AMERICAN CORPORATIONS AND POLITICIANS! China, excuse me COMMUNIST China has a long way to go before it is deserving of the presitge and respect that comes with hosting the Olympics, at least in my book. But, then it shouldn't surprise anyone that these crafty, little, commie, fuckers are pulling this off; they've managed to deceive the American public into buying their shitty, mass produced, poison-laced, fire hazardous, plastic garbage for decades. Oh wait, that's Walmart isn't it? Who can tell the difference these days??

Will Write for Food:

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