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Sunday, September 07, 2008

Grand Old Honky Party - Way of the Dinosaur

Jesus Christ, have you ever seen so many old, white, mother fuckers in your life? It looked more like a crypt keeper convention than a political one. Seriously, they couldn't find a single person of color to speak or even put in the crowd? What ever happened to J.C. Watts of Oklahoma? They used to bring him out, smiling and waving, and he would convince white America that black people weren't all that bad. They would tout him as the future of the party and praise his conservative values. Maybe they were just thankful he never impregnated any white women or in any case it was all an act because now, apparently, the future of the party is a woman named Sarah Palin. She gave a boring speech, written for her by GOP operatives, that only a miserable housefrau could find inspiring. When she wasn't being cynical, lying about her record or tugging at the heart strings of over-eating housewives, she was giving us her one solution to every problem America has: drill, drill, drill. Terrorism, drill. Economics, drill. Global warming, drill. Painful rectal itching, drill. Truth be told, I couldn't help thinking about drilling while watching her mouth move. Every time she smacked or licked her lips I had an urge to turn her off and go watch my bukakke videos. And those eyeglasses reminded me of this fetish porn that I once watched where this librarian... ahem, I digress. Seriously, who cares if she's a total sex pot and a cougar? The woman is the fucking anti-christ and the worst choice for a sidekick since Judas, so don't let the little head punch the card in November just cause you'd like to bend her over the podium and pull her hair back while thrusting and grinding your hips into her over and over and over... ahem... sorry bout that!
McCain on the other hand gave the expected boring, horse shit speech. I can't believe this guy now has the balls to say he is all about change after spending 8 years voting in lock step with GWB. How full of shit is he?? Better yet, how stupid does he think people are? I have to agree with Peggy Noonan his choice for VP is political bullshit. He drew our attention for a couple moments and now that we have had time to look this ticket over it's obvious that she was picked because running against BO with McCain is going to be political suicide. In fact, running against the Dems this year, anywhere, is bound to be a career ender. I see gains in both houses for the Dems in every state and I'll just call it now; Obama by a landslide. If there is one thing I know about winning political campaigns it is that they are not about who comes out to vote, but who stays home the first Tuesday in November. McCain has given Republicans, moderates and even real conservatives (not the holy rolling, Rush Limbaugh, retarded nazi crowd that has taken control of the party) reason to play hooky that day.

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