Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Sayonara Mother Fuckers
I never thought I would agree with Chuck Grassely. He's an angry, old, white man who represents the angry, old, white people of Iowa. We just run in different circles. But I have to hand it to the asshole. He said that the thieving bastards from AIG who want to walk away with 165 Mil of tax payer money should either give up the money or publicly kill themselves. I think it's about time people started talking about violence as a remedy for our financial woes. Hanging bastards like Jeff Skilling, Dennis Kozlowski's and Bernie Madoff off the side of a bridge from their nutsacks won't bring a single dime back to the investors or taxpayers. It would, however, give me a warm fuzzy feeling and personally I don't know what would be wrong with feeding the whole lot of them to a pack of hungry badgers, on prime time TV. Actually, if we could find someone to produce a show where these soft fingered, amoral, lowlifes have to run through a maze of death only to be dismembered if they make it out anyway, I would actually consider watching TV again (other than BSG, of course, (please don't go!))
I think we could have a celebrity version of the "Labyrinth of Reprisal" or "The Great Reparation Relay" (Mark Burnett, eat your heart out). We could actually start with Chuck Grassley. He did, after all, TAKE "119 earmarks totaling nearly $120 million" according to the Iowa Independent, so in that sense he's as much a thieving piece of shit as those AIG types.
It's like this, those fuckers on 9/11 killed 3000 people in the blink of an eye. It sucked and we retaliated as only we Americans can; we bombed the shit out of brown people. Right? We threw cab drivers in prison indefinitely and tortured and maimed and let GWB take a big ol' shit on our Constitution and ultimately we killed an assload of people as retribution for the death of our 3000. We took our pound of flesh and declared a "War on Terror" and we called it justice when we shocked and awed those mother fuckers "over there".
Now, all of a sudden, the bad guys are wearing $10k black Armani suits and for some reason we have to treat them with kidgloves. We have to follow the letter of the law; the lawyers have to open their appointment books and the justice Department has to ask politely for affidavits. Does the law request a hearing when a young black kid in the ghetto sells a joint on a street corner? Do the Sheriff's Deputies knock politely on the door of a family who is being evicted because they can't pay the mortgage? NO! The law brings in the bulldozers, pops off the flash bangs and wrestles your 90 year old granny to the ground with a a Jiu-jitsu death choke!
Yet, these "greed is good", Ayn Rand and Henry Kissinger worshipping mother fuckers have been the cause of more suicides, poverty and general misery in the US and worldwide for the last 30 years than any camel fucking terrorist. They have brought our country to the brink of economic collapse and have destroyed lives with their corrupted souls and "fuck you = more for me" approach to making a living. Suicide is too good for them; ALL OF THEM! I say, let's watch them run for their lives. Let's grab pitchforks and chase them down alleyways and watch the gutters fill with blood. Let's write about them in history books as the thieves that tried to destroy us all. Let's soil their names and wreck their lives for generations to come the way they have ruined our credit and turned our lives upside down. BLOOD! BLOOD! BLOOD!
Or we could just make them pay back all of the money they stole, make "short selling" illegal from now on and outlaw earmarks permanently. At least that would be a start.